I had just woke the fuck up today feeling like shit. But i took this bad ass shower and it got me straight. I went to go put on my pimp gear, all groomed the fuck up, pimped out sagadacious and shit. I'm tellin you they gotta make up a word for the way i look in my shit nigga. This raggedy nigga could make rags look bling. I checked my clock and cursed out the mirror for making me late..again. So I decided to skip on putting contacts in my eyes, i knew it was gonna be a very relaxed day anyway, i got all my bitches in check. This mutha fuckin intern is gonna give his eyes a rest. Soon as i left to go catch the bus i got hungry and opened the fridge. Aint nothing there for breakfast. So like a fucking pit, i look over at the cookie jar. And all the vanilla flavored oreos are taken. And i Take that motha fuckin' cookie jar. And I shake that bitch."Where's my mother fuckin' cookie"! I said, And they're was none. Just those nasty ass nilla wafers and original oreos. And i wasn't about to bite into that shit after brushing my teeth. So i said fuck breakfast, this nigga is goin hungry...again. I walk to the bus stop and i'm standing there can't see shit. All of a sudden this white bitch stands next to me. And I give her ass a stone cold look. And she looks up and smiles. So i look away thinking, no fucking way this crazy white bitch just smiled at me in the middle of a bus-stop. Like i reminded her of her favorite fuck. So i give this bitch another stone-cold look and she smiles at me again. But we saw the bus arrive and I gave her ass another Stare. The fuck you You aint cuttin' in front of me stare. So i manned my ground and tested the waters with this sly bitch. So i put my money in for the bus driver, and this motha fucka didn't even say good morning, if i was white he'll be suckin my dick. But since i'm not. He's just looking st8. That's how i like it. Stick my shit in your ear canal instead. I didn't want to dirty my shit with ear wax, So i paid the fare instead. Snobby mutha fucka'. So i go and grab the seat that faces the right side of the bridge once you enter the verrezano. and low and behold. That bitch sits right across from me. And I'm telling you this honey is fly. She had a fuckable figure and all that mess. So i look at her and look away. Lick my lips thinking i can take it but i can't
and i look at her again and i really can't take it
so i look away and plan my move.
"okay, the stupid bitch is into fashion, she's reading one of those lame-ass bitch fashion mags. I got this shit. how many bitches you know Pride that are into fashion. This bitch is a bad muthafucka. you worse. You know you got this bitch bagged already, shit! you And her practically married PriDe, go run your shit nigga!"
And BOOM!
i turn my whole body facin' her fine ass.
"So, your into fashion."
"huh" (now her ass is on one chair, and her upper body is on the chair closer to me)
and i repeat " I see you fine ass with that healthy hair and low cut dress is into fashion "
"oh no, this is a runners magazine."
And boom, PriDe just got hit with an uppercut. Dug my own muthafucking grave. PriDe could take this knockout down for the count, but it aint happenin'. I told you, we married. Although i hate marriage, and all that shit.'
"Do you smile a lot while you run, or do you only do that when you see people standing around a bus-stop"
"ha, troo. You looked a little sad, i thought a smile would lift your day"
"Don't mistake sad for hard girl, i'll tear that ass up in a heartbeat.
And i turn my seat away from this attractive bitch. I'm telling you. I got my shit saddled for this ho. When the ride finished I head outside and we suprisingly get out the same stop. And i get a look at her fine face again and
"DAmmmm,!!
You turned ugly. Wtf, you all old and shit.
What happened to your teeth?
why they all brown .
And your skin, i thought you had those sexy bags under your eyes.
looks like you had a skin peel go wrong.
Wut up with your old ass reading running magazines?
Go get a cozmo mag or some shit for that face!"
And i'm out.
Lesson noted.
Don't leave house without contacts!
2 comments:
You don't Reeeallly talk to us women like that, do you, PriDe? Seems outta character to me. :) Funny twist to the end of the story. haha. Keeping me entertained at 3 in the morn... but that's you, durty. Oh! lol.
lol, some of the conversation I initiated was of the norm. But the thought process behind actions is where the intrigue lies. Men shift drastically in pure to impure thoughts all the time. It's a constant struggle to maintain themselves where it would matter by others if ethics were involved. With the responsibility of being influential in other people eyes, A power only a man of talent can sway towards any given path.
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